On losing her friend Dan Fredinburg, who was killed while climbing Mount Everest: “Losing one of my best friends a few months ago shattered me. There were days I felt like my body had been turned inside out. I felt like my heart was on the outside of my body and everyone who came near me was stabbing me. The crazy thing is that since Dan died, the lessons have come like Mack trucks. There is no next time. There is no excuse to wait a day to do what you want to do and to change the way that you want to change.”
On judging herself: “The word ‘enough’ is a monster for me. I don’t know how anyone ever feels that they are enough: successful enough, smart enough, pretty enough, healthy enough. I got so scared the first time I decided to say, ‘I am terrified of not being enough.’ And what came back tenfold — women who identify, women who sympathize and women who experience all of that — was mind-boggling to me. We are so in this together. And that helps. A friend said to me, ‘Let it be enough, whatever you did today. You went on a two-mile run and you didn’t do a circuit-training workout? Who cares? Let it be enough.'”
On wanting to save the world: “I always wanted to save the world. My parents thought it was sweet and that I’d outgrow it — and I never did!
On being 33: “I don’t think I just trust every single person anymore. I’m really coming into myself. There’s something about 33. You know, it’s one of those sort of sacred years. Thirty was amazing, and 33 is really only getting better. I feel much more rooted. I’ve learned how to listen to my intuition. My heart still feels open and I’m still madly in love with the world, but I understand very quickly how to read a person’s energy and how to better protect my own.”
On her Chicago P.D. character: “I’m never going to pick a role that is a person who I wouldn’t want to hang out with. I want to hang out with an interesting, layered, multifaceted woman who is unapologetic about her strength and her vulnerability.”
On being independent and trying to let people help her more: “I’m practicing allowing for my femininity more. One of my friends challenged me, ‘Let the man who offers to put your bag in the overhead on the plane put your bag in the overhead.’ I was like, ‘But I packed it. I can carry it!’ She said, ‘It’s not the point.’ So, now, every time a guy asks me if he can lift my bag up, I go, ‘Sure! Thank you.’ And I bask in the fact that someone wants to do something nice for me. It’s all being just a little more open.”
On the pressure too look good as women: “I think it’s hard for everyone. Do I think that there has historically been more pressure [in Hollywood than elsewhere]? Yes. Do I think that because of media and airbrushing and social media and Instagram and Facebook and Twitter, that it’s now the same for everyone? I think it’s crazy. We are so conditioned as women to hate on ourselves all the time, but look at what we can do.”
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